“You stole all my money!”
“You poisoned my food!”
“You have trapped me in this prison!”
False accusations are a common behaviour observed in people with Alzheimer’s disease or dementia. Such suspicious delusions are referred to as paranoia, mainly caused by confusion and memory loss. With declining cognitive function, the person with dementia tries to make sense of his or her world, consequently generating intense, wild thoughts.
While such comments may be hurtful, it is important to remember it is their disease causing the delusion. Therefore, carers should learn ways to calmly respond to the situation and be prepared.
8 ways to deal with false dementia accusations:
1. Don’t take offence
Remember – your senior is only apprehensive because of their brain trying to adjust to reality. Rather than taking it personally, focus on reassuring them and let the person know that you care.
2. Don’t argue or use logic to convince
It is rather challenging trying to win an argument with someone who no longer can process logic properly. You will only agitate them. Instead, allow the individual to express ideas and acknowledge his or her opinions.
3. Use a soothing tone and reassuring body language
It is most important to stay calm in all situations. Bring the adrenaline level down by using a gentle, calm tone of voice. Also, reassure the individual non-verbally, for instance with a hug or a gentle touch.
4. Create a calm environment
Many people forget the importance of the environment. Creating a calm environment can reduce the tension of the situation. Minimise surrounding noise by turning off TV, music or asking other people to leave the room.
5. Offer a simple answer
Long explanations can be overwhelming for your senior to process, causing confusion. So keep your responses short and simple.
6. Present a pleasant activity to shift their attention
Distract them from their obsessive accusation by first sympathising with their emotion, then offering a fun, engaging activity.
7. Duplicate any lost items
If the person is often in search of a specific item, have multiples of that item. Being prepared for misplacement of the item can prevent chances of accusation.
8. Share your experience with others
Although being aware of the causes of delusion, falsely being accused can be hurtful. It is important to relieve your upsetting feelings with others who can empathise with your experiences. Join caregiver communities either in person or online.
We understand caring for a person with dementia is difficult. If you are seeking help, contact us.